Awards

 

- Winner, Professional Category (2018): Ars Nova Singers 7th Annual Colorado Composers Competition (Premiered by this group under Tom Morgan on Apr. 27th, 2018 at Bethany Lutheran Church in Denver, CO).

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The Story

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In recent years, we’ve become more aware as a society that there is not a single, rigidly correct “cookie-cutter” path in life – whether it be in regards to how one lives their life, or even how one should identify themselves. However, there are still many who live day to day in confusion and pain, being told that they are wrong for being “this,” or dedicating their lives to “that.”

 

The first piece in the set, "Alone," is the initial moment when one realizes they're not like everyone else. When they speak of "the demon in my view," they are referring to an embodiment or manifestation of this difference that has been demonized by a group that considers it "against the grain."

 

In the second movement, “Hymn,” the questions are asked “Why am I this way?” or “Why can’t I just be like everyone else.” Being constantly berated by corrections – and sometimes even disgust – at who you are can cause so much pain, and this movement is a snapshot of a pinnacle moment of utter hopelessness.

 

The final piece in this set, "Evening Star," is the moment of acceptance – and pride – of these differences; creating a self-love. Despite the moon being a large and beautiful source of light, it's the Evening Star that "more I admire...than that colder, lowly light."

 

Edgar Allan Poe had his own moments of this pain and frustration in his life, as many of his contemporaries thought of his poetry and short stories to be quite contrived, unimaginative, and sometimes even simply ridiculous (“who in this century thinks of night as a beautiful thing?”). However, it’s often these “differences” that make beauty abound in the individual, and it’s those who are “different” that really make the world change. When we share these brief moments of despair together, we begin opening a dialogue with each-other (or even ourselves) to explore self-worth. It is my hope that if you’re in one of these transition moments in your life, this music will help you find that inner-peace so you can experience a resoundingly confident self-love.

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Listen:

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(ii. Hymn - 3:43)

(iii. Evening Star - 6:40)

See the Score:

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Text:

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English

Poems by Edgar Allan Poe

 

I. Alone

From childhood’s hour I have not been 

As others were—I have not seen 

As others saw—I could not bring 

My passions from a common spring— 

From the same source I have not taken 

My sorrow—I could not awaken 

My heart to joy at the same tone— 

And all I lov’d—I lov’d alone— 

Then—in my childhood—in the dawn 

Of a most stormy life—was drawn 

From ev’ry depth of good and ill 

The mystery which binds me still— 

From the torrent, or the fountain— 

From the red cliff of the mountain— 

From the sun that ’round me roll’d 

In its autumn tint of gold— 

From the lightning in the sky 

As it pass’d me flying by— 

From the thunder, and the storm— 

And the cloud that took the form 

(When the rest of Heaven was blue) 

Of a demon in my view—

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